Gee, Thanks

A loyal reader sent this photo to me last night with the caption, "So sad this is necessary". I couldn't agree more. It then got me thinking about what kinds of people buy this sort of book. I mean, if you don't know to WRITE thank-you notes, would it occur to you to buy a book ABOUT thank-you notes? And if you ARE a thank-you note writer, wouldn't that probably mean that you are aware of the art of thank-you notes, in which case, you wouldn't NEED a book?

I posed this question back to the loyal reader and he responded that this book is purchased by the same demographic as those who purchase etiquette books. This notion, I disagree with and I'll tell you why. The Miss Manners - Emily Post umbrella is vast. It covers an endless amount of categories and subcategories. There is an Emily Post Institute, for crying out loud. It's located in Vermont and it's Incorporated. Clearly, this is a world unto itself. (A world, I admit, with which I am COMPLETELY fascinated...an entire Inc. on manners? Who knew?) Etiquette encompasses everything from fish forks to salutations. And then there is the business of wedding etiquette. Wedding etiquette comes with enough material for a solo posting.

I openly admit to owning a copy of Emily Post. I couldn't tell you which edition because much like the prongs of etiquette, there are several. The book is a wonderful resource for those rare occasions when you DO NOT receive a reply card with a wedding invitation (a-hem - see Least Favorite Things List, Part I, #16) and you need to compose an old fashioned response. The very precise wording, type of stationary, and, I believe, the ink color required, are all there. How so very helpful! A one stop shop for being polite!

While we're on the subject of reply cards, let me just say that I understand they are a necessary evil. Reply cards are here to stay. They are a sign of the times and they makes sense. Again, I'm a purist and I love the old school ways of doing things. Call me antiquated. I've been called worse. Fundamentally, I know that it's not realistic or fiscally smart to rely upon the old way of responding to a wedding invitation. But I still like it.

I work part-time in a high end stationary and paper store. No greeting cards. No wrapping paper. Paper and stationary. It's a fantastic store and I love the four hours a week I put in there. When I first started working there, I noticed something I had never seen before. In the Children's Section of the store where there are displays of birth announcements and stationary for those just starting out on the thank-you note path I found the equivalent of a thank-you note reply card. This totally took me by surprise. Basically, we're talking the Mad-Libs of thank-you notes. Fill in the blank:

"Dear____________, Thank you so much for the _______________. You are so thoughtful to think of me. Love,_____________".

Seriously, I am not making this up. As I read it in my head, it sounds like the dictation of an old fashioned, WWII, telegram. Dear Roberta. Stop. I hope you are doing well. Stop. Will be home soon. Stop. I have typhoid. Stop.

Not exactly what one would call a heart-felt piece of correspondence. It gets the job done, but it seems so rushed and so impersonal. So insincere. Makes me wonder if the children who start out with these drive-through thank you notes will continue with the same bland, cadence in their adult thank you notes...

I do believe I have just answered my own question. These grateful Mad-Libbers of today are the Art of Thank You buyers of tomorrow.